HI, I'M GARETH...

The Horror-Obsessed Irish Guy with the Welsh Name Who Lives in England but Writes Worldwide.

Simply put: words are my life. 

At different times of day (and night) I wear different hats – both literally and figuratively. I'm a...

  • Copywriter
  • Marketer
  • Consultant
  • Ghostwriter
  • Author
  • Script Doctor
  • Writing Tutor
  • Story Coach

This is my home, The Copy Crypt, based in Nottingham, UK.

Though it may not seem like it at first glance, balancing the worlds of creative and commercial writing isn't all that difficult. Skills from one easily transfer to the other, and narrative is king.

Whether we're talking a white-knuckle thriller novel designed to make a plane journey fly by (pun intended) or an email leading to a sale, the push and pull – the allure, the surprise, the need to know more – of a great narrative structure can shove its pudgy fingers in your brain pan and refuse to let go.

And if you haven't already figured it out, my big kick is horror. That doesn't mean I add horrific elements to everything, but y'know...

I try.

Anyway – nice to meet you. If you have an exciting mid-to-high ticket offer and a mailing list that's either totally eager or sadly neglected, we should talk.

As an AWAI/Agora-trained copywriter, I've worked with businesses across multiple industries – and many different countries – to create profitable campaigns, boost lead generation, integrate funnels and automations, and more.

From helping SMEs get off the ground, to scaling 6-figure business to 7-figures and squeezing some extra conversion percentage points for established digital empires, I've been deep in the trenches and held positions from simple content writer to Head of Copy/Copy Chief and de facto Director of Marketing.  

And it hasn't all been rosy or simple, with some markets being very tough nuts to crack. 

So you know that when we chat, you're not getting some deluded BS advice from someone who's only worked in low-effort, low-resistance industries.

When I'm not writing commercial copy, you'll find me working on new fiction, helping private coaching clients break through with their story ideas, and hosting horror-centric writing courses and workshops, including discussions with esteemed horror and thriller storytellers such as Ramsey Campbell, J.D. Barker, Paul Tremblay, and R.L. Stine, to name just a few.

As a fiction tutor, I host the highly-rated Nightmare Fuel writing course and have presented at online summits such as Daniel David Wallace's Escape the Plot Forest and Perfect Your Process.

I'm a massive tech geek and, if you believe in such theories, according to the Myers-Briggs Personality Type Indicator I’m the world’s rarest type – INFJ: “The Advocate” – which might go some way toward explaining my incessant drive for helping businesses connect with the people whose lives they intend to make easier.

But that's enough about me. Get in touch and let me know more about you. I'm sure we'll do great things together.

10

Years in Business

5000+

Emails, Landing Pages, and Marketing Assets Created

0

Tolerance for Bullshit

  • Matthew B.
    An amazing job. He really took the time to understand our business and helped us get our best message across in a clear and precise manner. Don't hesitate... get him on board before someone else does!
    Matthew B.
  • Niky N.
    This is AMAZING! Thank you thank you! I've had other writers take a jab at this but they can't quite get the fun and easy-going tone I'm looking for. You've got it!
    Niky N.
  • Steve B.
    I can assure you of [Gareth's] professionalism, trustworthiness and attention to detail. Few writers have his depth of knowledge.
    Steve B.
  • Julie J.
    Thank you for the fabulous work you have done on our behalf. It has really increased our donations and helped raise awareness. We can't thank you enough.
    Julie J.
  • Pete C.
    I was having fundamental problems. I'm certain I lost many leads, too. People attempted to help, but couldn't grasp what I was trying to achieve. They ended up having a stab in the dark and only made the situation worse. I then met Gareth. Here's a mental image for you: imagine Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson in one of those action films saving the day. Now replace The Rock with Gareth. Yep - he's one of those guys. Probably as hench, too.
    Pete C.